For years I made New Years Resolutions. Every year it was always the exact same thing! I would lose (insert insane number here) pounds during the next year. The result? By the 3rd week of January I had already fallen off the wagon and was so depressed because of my failure. By the end of the year I'd actually gained more weight than I started with.
My biggest obstacle is cooking. I like to have someone to talk to when I cook. Before mom died, she was always my cooking buddy. She'd come into the kitchen or sit in her bedroom (right off the kitchen) and we'd talk while I cooked. After she died, I lost the joy of cooking. That meant meals weren't as healthy because we were eating more junk and eventually we were eating out more than I was cooking. For 7 of us we were spending an insane amount of money eating out. TOTALLY crazy. I knew this, but I still had no desire to cook. I got to the point that even eating at some of my most favorite restaurants (The Melting Pot excluded) just didn't even have the appeal they once did. I grew to dislike food.
I am going to start cooking again this year. I will save lots of money. My biggest issue will be grocery shopping. I HATE grocery shopping. It takes forever then I come home and it takes forever to put things up. I think one of the reasons I dread it so much is because this was always another activity I did with Mama. I think John and I will start taking turns going to the grocery store.
I am so proud of myself for not waiting until January to start my journey. I don't want the NYR stigma attached to my journey. I am now on Day 4 of my medication. I woke up this morning feeling slightly energized! Normally, I wake up and feel like I could just go back to sleep. While I feel a little tired, I have a little energy, too.
My biggest accomplishment this week was that I started exercising. I went Thursday and walked half a mile and felt like I was dying. My chest hurt. My legs hurt. I felt like I was going to pass out. Yesterday, my goal was to walk 3/4 mile. I felt horrible. My chest still hurt so I slowed down a bit. I made it to a half mile and thought I'd never make my goal. By the time I made it to my goal, I was back up to the speed I wanted to be at. I wasn't feeling so bad so I kept walking. I made it a whole mile! I cannot tell you the last time I've walked a mile.
Dinner the last two nights was Shoney's salad and cabbage soup. It came in at just under 500 calories. All and all I'd say we'd call it a great couple of days. I'm really proud of myself.
Weight Loss Mama
Saturday, December 31, 2011
Friday, December 30, 2011
My List
My list...
I saw a post on a friend's blog. She got the idea from one of her friends, and I loved it! For every pound lost, give a reason to have lost that pound! Here is my list so far.
1. To live to raise my kids, not just live but be able to have a full life.
2. To be able to get pregnant without fertility drugs, without miscarriage, and without risking my life to do so.
3. To be able to play with my kids without getting out of breath.
4. Sit comfortably without pinching the nerve in my hip.
5. Walk through the pew at church without having to side step
6. Walk a mile without feeling like I'm dying.
7. I want to see my great grandchildren.
8. I want to be proud of myself.
9. I want to believe my husband when he tells me I'm gorgeous and not just believe he's saying because he feels he has to.
10. Not have my legs touch in the middle
11. To walk in a room without feeling everyone is talking about me.
12. To be able to dress up when I go out on a date with my husband.
13. To not die at the age of 61 like my mama did.
14. To avoid all the health problems my mama had.
15. To be a good role model for my children, especially my girls.
16. To get the new wardrobe my sister promised me 20 years ago if I would lose weight. She told me the other day that she still intends to make good on her promise when I lose everything I need too. (220 lbs to go).
17. To be able to use to Wii Fit. My starting weight exceeded the limit.
18. To be able to hug my husband without leaning forward.
19. To be able to be carried over the threshold for my 10th anniversary.
20. To make my mama proud of me.
21. To be able to shop and not pay extra for my clothes.
22. To have ENERGY.
23. To be able to stand and see my legs.
24. To be able to stand and see my toes!
25. To be able to carry my 7 year old without having back pain for the next day.
26. To rid myself of sleep apnea.
27. To learn how to make healthy eating choices.
28. To feel like said healthy eating isn't a punishment.
29. To no longer make excuses for my eating behavior. (working on that one now.)
30. To not get depressed when I food journal.
31. To have a normal BP.
32. To live without diabetes.
33. To go to the doctor without being lectured about losing weight.
34. To go to the beach without feeling like a freak in a bathing suit.
(To be Cont.)
This just the beginning of my list. I look forward to seeing this list in the 100s and then in the 200s. This is a hard journey, but seeing what I've accomplished makes it so worth it. The best is yet to come!!
I saw a post on a friend's blog. She got the idea from one of her friends, and I loved it! For every pound lost, give a reason to have lost that pound! Here is my list so far.
1. To live to raise my kids, not just live but be able to have a full life.
2. To be able to get pregnant without fertility drugs, without miscarriage, and without risking my life to do so.
3. To be able to play with my kids without getting out of breath.
4. Sit comfortably without pinching the nerve in my hip.
5. Walk through the pew at church without having to side step
6. Walk a mile without feeling like I'm dying.
7. I want to see my great grandchildren.
8. I want to be proud of myself.
9. I want to believe my husband when he tells me I'm gorgeous and not just believe he's saying because he feels he has to.
10. Not have my legs touch in the middle
11. To walk in a room without feeling everyone is talking about me.
12. To be able to dress up when I go out on a date with my husband.
13. To not die at the age of 61 like my mama did.
14. To avoid all the health problems my mama had.
15. To be a good role model for my children, especially my girls.
16. To get the new wardrobe my sister promised me 20 years ago if I would lose weight. She told me the other day that she still intends to make good on her promise when I lose everything I need too. (220 lbs to go).
17. To be able to use to Wii Fit. My starting weight exceeded the limit.
18. To be able to hug my husband without leaning forward.
19. To be able to be carried over the threshold for my 10th anniversary.
20. To make my mama proud of me.
21. To be able to shop and not pay extra for my clothes.
22. To have ENERGY.
23. To be able to stand and see my legs.
24. To be able to stand and see my toes!
25. To be able to carry my 7 year old without having back pain for the next day.
26. To rid myself of sleep apnea.
27. To learn how to make healthy eating choices.
28. To feel like said healthy eating isn't a punishment.
29. To no longer make excuses for my eating behavior. (working on that one now.)
30. To not get depressed when I food journal.
31. To have a normal BP.
32. To live without diabetes.
33. To go to the doctor without being lectured about losing weight.
34. To go to the beach without feeling like a freak in a bathing suit.
(To be Cont.)
This just the beginning of my list. I look forward to seeing this list in the 100s and then in the 200s. This is a hard journey, but seeing what I've accomplished makes it so worth it. The best is yet to come!!
Wednesday, December 28, 2011
December 28th - New Program
Today is the 3rd anniversary of my mother's death. My mom died at the young age of 61. She died 13 years younger than my grandmother was when she died. Following family tradition that puts me at dying in my 40s. That is NOT acceptable to me. My sister told me that she was going to give me and my children life for Christmas. She is paying for me to join a medical weight loss program. This morning was my first visit. I haven't been to the doctor in over a year. That also means I haven't had my diabetes medication in over 6 months either. My blood pressure was high because I was nervous and I almost didn't get to join the program because of it. They checked it again at the end of the visit and it was back down to my normal so they gave me the script I would need for this month. The receptionist was also able to put me in touch with a doctor who works with patients without insurance so the costs are low enough for me to afford them. I will be making an appt with him soon.
They weighed and measured me. We went over the program and then they prescribed Phentermine for me. I was given my instructions as to how to take it. I will work on increasing activity and decreasing my calorie intake. I was put on an 1800 calorie diet. Knowing how much I consume that seems so low, but I know I have to do this and I will. She told me it wouldn't be as hard as I think it will be. Of course I had all of the normal snide, sarcastic comments come to mind, but I didn't verbalize them. ;-)
This is where I need a lot of help from those around me. I need lots of warm fuzzies to keep me going. I need prayers and encouragement. I usually try things for a short while then give up. This time I will be held accountable, though. When I am down, please lift me up. If God puts me on your mind, please say a prayer and then let me know you were thinking of me.
My first goal was lose 5 lbs. I have done that so my next goal will be to lose 10% of my original weight 36 lbs. I am almost there. I will reach that goal before my next appt.
Now for the important details
Starting Wt: 360
Today's Wt: 326
Today's Loss: 34
Total Loss: 34 (I didn't realize I had lost that much)
Goal #2 Progress: 34lbs
Mini Goal 2: Lose 36 lbs.
For those of you walking this journey with me, thank you!
Until next time...Lisa
They weighed and measured me. We went over the program and then they prescribed Phentermine for me. I was given my instructions as to how to take it. I will work on increasing activity and decreasing my calorie intake. I was put on an 1800 calorie diet. Knowing how much I consume that seems so low, but I know I have to do this and I will. She told me it wouldn't be as hard as I think it will be. Of course I had all of the normal snide, sarcastic comments come to mind, but I didn't verbalize them. ;-)
This is where I need a lot of help from those around me. I need lots of warm fuzzies to keep me going. I need prayers and encouragement. I usually try things for a short while then give up. This time I will be held accountable, though. When I am down, please lift me up. If God puts me on your mind, please say a prayer and then let me know you were thinking of me.
My first goal was lose 5 lbs. I have done that so my next goal will be to lose 10% of my original weight 36 lbs. I am almost there. I will reach that goal before my next appt.
Now for the important details
Starting Wt: 360
Today's Wt: 326
Today's Loss: 34
Total Loss: 34 (I didn't realize I had lost that much)
Goal #2 Progress: 34lbs
Mini Goal 2: Lose 36 lbs.
For those of you walking this journey with me, thank you!
Until next time...Lisa
Sunday, July 31, 2011
Scared
I hate myself. When am I going to really get it together? I just turned 28. I don't want to be dead before I'm 30. I love my kids and I want to be around to raise them. I remember Mama making that statement many times and she died at the young age of 61. I am disgusted with myself. The batteries died in my scale so I don't even know what I weigh. I find myself eating even if I'm not hungry and I eat way too much when I do eat. I need a good diet make over. I need changes that I can live with forever. I am so out of shape that I don't even have a "shape." I am thinking about joining a gym again so I can exercise, but that didn't work out last time, either. I'm not sure where I'm going with with this. I am at a low point and I need something/someone to bring me out of it!
Feeling Hopeless...
Feeling Hopeless...
Sunday, April 24, 2011
First Goal Set!
Ok, so I haven't really taken this seriously until now. I hope that this was the kick in the pants I needed. I started feeling horrible last week. I had also stopped taking my metformin thinking I didn't really need it. Well, when I checked my blood sugar it was well over 300. Yes, I am stupid! I am awful and my kids deserve better than this so I'm going to give it to them!
I purchased Wii Fit a few weeks ago, but I'm too fat to use it. My first goal will be able to use it. Goal #1 will be to lose 60 lbs. to use this program.
I also started food journaling with http://www.sparkpeople.com and was made aware of why I'm gaining weight like I am. WAY too much dining out and fast food. I knew it wasn't healthy, but I was unaware of just how much I was eating. It's gross when I think about it!
Wt: 360
Goal #1 Progress: none
Mini goal: 5 lbs before vacation in two weeks.
I purchased Wii Fit a few weeks ago, but I'm too fat to use it. My first goal will be able to use it. Goal #1 will be to lose 60 lbs. to use this program.
I also started food journaling with http://www.sparkpeople.com and was made aware of why I'm gaining weight like I am. WAY too much dining out and fast food. I knew it wasn't healthy, but I was unaware of just how much I was eating. It's gross when I think about it!
Wt: 360
Goal #1 Progress: none
Mini goal: 5 lbs before vacation in two weeks.
Wednesday, March 16, 2011
Weigh In 3/16
I haven't been good with my diet or exercise. I hope to get better though.
Today's Weigh In
Ht: 5'0
Wt: 347.2
Wt Loss/Gain: 9.8 lbs
Total Wt Loss: 9.8 lbs
Today's Weigh In
Ht: 5'0
Wt: 347.2
Wt Loss/Gain: 9.8 lbs
Total Wt Loss: 9.8 lbs
Friday, February 11, 2011
Having Trouble Getting Started
As a mom with 5 kids and a husband with two jobs, it's so easy to stop and pick up food. Mom saves time, but gains the pounds. Totally not worth it, but it's hard to break the habit. I cooked for the first time in I don't know how long last night. What did I make? Hotdogs...and then snacked on left overs all evening. I eat because it's habit. I really do want to succeed, but this is going to be harder than I thought. Encouragement is welcome. Thanks so much.
Weight Loss Mama
Weight Loss Mama
Monday, February 7, 2011
Introduction
Welcome to my weight loss journey. My name is Lisa. I am a 27 year old wife to one and mom to 11 beautiful children. We have 5 with us and 6 angels. They are why I have decided to fight this. I want to get healthy and stay healthy so I can see my grandchildren grow up.
Two years ago my mom passed away. She was only 61 when she passed. She'd smoked for over 30 years before she quit. She had a heart attack in 03 (56) and had open heart surgery because of it. Shortly after that, she became an amputee and would later lose her other leg all because of an evil monster named diabetes. My grandparents also had a host of medical problems also.
Why have I waited so long to get healthy? I didn't have the best childhood growing up. My mom was divorced. She had 4 children from that marriage that were teenagers by the time I came along. She worked like crazy to support her family and wasn't home much. Family life wasn't always the best. I learned to control the areas of my life that I could. Eating became my drug of choice. If I was upset I would eat to numb the pain...eventually I'd eat because I was sad, happy, mad, etc. It wasn't until recently that I realize I eat for the sheer emotional high it gives me. Rarelyat for nourishment. I'm also a huge couch potato. I need to learn to get up and get moving. My biggest problem is that my family has always judged me because of my weight. I've always felt I needed to lose weight for them to love me. They are always throwing diets my way that I may fit into their perfect little bubble. I have created this blog to confront my fears. I often closet diet so that if I fail then I don't have to listen to everyone else's comments.
My husband and I went through fertility treatments a couple years ago where I was diagnosed with PCOS (polycystic ovarian syndrome) and "borderline" diabetes. That should've been enough to wake me up, but it wasn't. We want more children and I know that I need to get healthy for that to happen so here I am.
I hope that you will stick around to see me succeed. I hope I succeed this time.
Thanks,
Weight Loss Mama
Two years ago my mom passed away. She was only 61 when she passed. She'd smoked for over 30 years before she quit. She had a heart attack in 03 (56) and had open heart surgery because of it. Shortly after that, she became an amputee and would later lose her other leg all because of an evil monster named diabetes. My grandparents also had a host of medical problems also.
Why have I waited so long to get healthy? I didn't have the best childhood growing up. My mom was divorced. She had 4 children from that marriage that were teenagers by the time I came along. She worked like crazy to support her family and wasn't home much. Family life wasn't always the best. I learned to control the areas of my life that I could. Eating became my drug of choice. If I was upset I would eat to numb the pain...eventually I'd eat because I was sad, happy, mad, etc. It wasn't until recently that I realize I eat for the sheer emotional high it gives me. Rarelyat for nourishment. I'm also a huge couch potato. I need to learn to get up and get moving. My biggest problem is that my family has always judged me because of my weight. I've always felt I needed to lose weight for them to love me. They are always throwing diets my way that I may fit into their perfect little bubble. I have created this blog to confront my fears. I often closet diet so that if I fail then I don't have to listen to everyone else's comments.
My husband and I went through fertility treatments a couple years ago where I was diagnosed with PCOS (polycystic ovarian syndrome) and "borderline" diabetes. That should've been enough to wake me up, but it wasn't. We want more children and I know that I need to get healthy for that to happen so here I am.
I hope that you will stick around to see me succeed. I hope I succeed this time.
Thanks,
Weight Loss Mama
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