My Rings Are Gone

I am at that stage where life is seeming very weird right now. My life is
changing for the better. While I know these are good things, my heart mourns the
loss of what was. I have always been the "fat kid." It is the only thing I know.

My weight still isn't coming off as fast as I would like, but my body is
changing. My skirts are slowly inching their way up my chest making me look like
a cross between an old lady and a hooker. I am constantly having to pull my
skirts back down to my waist. (This next part only fellow fatties will
understand...for those skinny people just follow along.) You know how you have
a top belly and a bottom belly? Well my top belly is starting to disappear. Now
the waist line of my skirts have nothing to hold them in place. The only truly
bad thing about this is that I'm sort of in between sizes right now so I just
have to find a way to deal with it.

The saddest part of my week was this afternoon when I gave my wedding rings
to my husband. I knew this day was coming, but I feel like a part of me is
missing. I held onto them as long as I could, but they were so loose they came
off in the shower at the gym. They were trying to slip off while on the
treadmill, too. For now we are going to try to find a ring to replace it. John
and I started our marriage out with very little money so I have a very cheap
(but very LOVED) set with crosses on them that we bought from Walmart right
after he asked me to marry him. My entire set was less than $80, but that
doesn't matter. I cherish them so. My hand feels naked. I feel like a part of me
is missing.

This post has been brewing for a few days, but it finally came to
be because of my rings. I know they are just rings...my love for John (and his
for me) is still there. These were just an outward symbol, but I have worn those
rings for almost 9 years. These changes are all a part the journey to a
healthier me, but so much is changing all at once. It is such a bitter sweet
milestone.


This is the day which the LORD hath made ; we will rejoice
and be glad in it. Psalm 118:24

Be Blessed,

Weight Loss Mama