Broken

Sometimes it hurts to be so close to the pain,
When I know the one who loves me most
Could make it all change
Sometimes I'm lost in the land of questioning
And I rub together timesless truths
Like flint and stone in the rain
And I don't understand where you are in all this
Still I wait and hope and pray and wish

And I won't be persuaded
Still I will believe beyond what I can see
No, I won't be persuaded
Not after all that we've been through
I won't turn my back on you
What would I hold
If not this simple thread
Cords of mercy bound together
Whit you on the other end
What can I do
When I cannot see your hands
That keep reaching out as if
You're never far from where I stand
But I don't understand where you are in all this
Still I remind myself to trust in you
'Cause I know what love is

Oh, I know you love me so
Still I get so tired sometimes
Won't you lift me up my love

I must admit that I am having a real problem this week with my blog signature scripture from last month.  I am facing some major personal challenge right now.  It is hard to see the good in this situation that I am facing.  It makes me question what God's plan is in this situation.  It seems that nothing about this could be God's will.  Do you ever find yourself looking at a situation wondering how He could possibly understand the pain and heartache of xyz?  I know I do.  I understand that the Bible teaches us that there is nothing we will ever face, or a step we will ever take that God has not already gone through.  I really don't mean to sound unchristian.  I just want to be real.  God is bigger than any problem I will ever face. This issue isn't too big for Him. 


I am heart broken.  I don't understand why God had to give us free will to hurt others.  As humans He knew we would screw it up so why do it at all?  I will never understand why people take pleasure in others' pain.  It doesn't make sense to me.  I was raised to do anything I could to help another person and I always try to help whenever I can.  I can remember when I was younger and was playing outside with friend how my Grandmother wouldn't allow me to buy an ice cream from the ice cream truck because all of my friends didn't have one.  Those friends never had a problem buying one if I didn't though.  To this day I won't eat/drink anything unless I have enough  for everyone.  I am trying to raise my children the same way.  I want them to be compassionate adults and that starts with compasionate children.


In the midst of all this brokenness, I was blessed to have my beloved Stephanie come to the gym with me last night.  That girl time was just what I needed to help soothe my soul.  I left feeling refreshed.  It was definitely a Godsend meeting for me. Girl, I love you.  I am so thankful for those people God's placed in my life to help me through times of brokenness.

And let us not be weary in well doing: for in due season we shall reap, if we faint not. - Galatians 6:9

Blessings,

Weight Loss Mama